Miracles happen- Baby #2!!!

Ok, this post might be a bit TMI since I'll be talking about signs of ovulation.  If you aren't interested in that, skip to the end.

So, after Doug started his new job we decided to start trying for baby #2.  With Teddy we tried 5 years on our own and ended up using Clomid because I didn't ovulate on my own.  Doug really wanted to wait and try on our own for a few months before consulting the OB for referral to the reproductive endocrinologist.  Knowing my fertility past we figured we'd call in January and most likely wouldn't even begin treatment until February or March and that it could take several rounds of Clomid, assuming that was all that was needed.

Doug was also gone for half of August.  I didn't even bother charting anything, which I probably really should have because I had just come off my birth control pill.  I don't usually have a period on my own so charting can get really difficult when you're not starting right on day 1.  Anyway, I figured it was mostly going to be a wash, but hey, at least I wasn't on bcp (which I hate with a fiery passion).

Here comes the TMI.  On August 30th after using the bathroom I noticed tons of mucus when I wiped.  Not discharge, mucus.  So I checked my cervical mucus and it was really stretchy and clear, looked just like egg whites.  I knew from before that was a very good sign of ovulation.  Doug was still gone but came home the next day.  I knew the timing wasn't great, 24 hours is kind of pushing it and when I checked that morning it wasn't very stretchy at all.

I was excited though.  I really believed I had ovulated on my own, for the first time ever!!!  We had Labor Day services that weekend and they were very powerful.  We had a prayer line on Sunday night and I just knew I had to be in it.

In 2008 I had felt the Lord was promising a child to me.  I had gotten home from work and was listening to a tape of Bro. Branham while folding clothes.  I had paused it earlier to leave for work and when I pressed play it was the prayer line and I usually just skip right past that because I knew God still healed and was more interested in the "meat" of the sermons.  But this time I listened.  I had heard stories of people listening to tapes and being healed, of being in the exact same situation as a person on the tape.  One was of a brother wearing a checkered shirt with paint on it that he had just thrown on last minute and it was in despair he pressed play and heard the words "You, sitting there with the checked shirt with paint on it!"  and the rest, which I can't remember, applied directly to him.  But it had never happened for me before.  That day, the first woman he prayed for was asking to be blessed with a baby.  I'll never forget hearing him discern her desires and how gently and happily he said "Oh, it's a baby!"  I fell instantly to my knees and cried "Behold the handmaid of the Lord, be it unto me as thou hast said."  Which is what Mary told the angel Gabriel when he told her she would be carrying the Messiah.  For some reason I looked at the clock.  Later that day I logged onto facebook and on a religious group page someone had posted that exact same scripture at the exact same time I was saying it.  I really felt like it was meant for me.

Later that year a brother preached and we had a prayer line and finally kicked out my demon of depression.  I had clung to it for far too long.

While in Alaska I was really struck with sermons on Abraham and Sarah.  Bro. Branham mentioned that Sarah would knit little booties, just claiming the promise.  So I decided to buy a baby outfit.  That was much harder than it sounds.  I had no clue the gender or the season it would be born in and in Alaska seasons matter!  I settled on a MVP baseball 3-6 month short sleeve onesie and found out a few weeks later that I was pregnant with Teddy!  At the time, it seemed fine to use medication.  I never felt like God was telling me not to.

This time was different.  I went in the prayer line for healing.  To be made new so that my body would allow me to conceive on it's own.

A few weeks later it was time to test and it came back negative.  So did the next one a few days later.  I figured that was it for this cycle since Doug wasn't home I wasn't too surprised at the answer.  But my period never came.  With the condition I had, polycystic ovarian syndrome, it was not unusual for me not to get a period but not be pregnant either.  I didn't think I was pregnant but I knew I wouldn't ovulate on my own if I didn't get my period.  It made me confused if what I first thought was ovulation was even ovulation at all.  We talked about if we should change our mind on when to call the OB.  I told Doug that I was feeling really conflicted that doing so would be doubting God's promise.  He said, well it's not unless you feel like God promised to heal you.  I said that's exactly what I felt like happened so he said we would just have to wait and claim it and believe in His timing.

Then I got really sick with a kidney infection.  I was puking for 24 hours and had a low fever, I never do either though I have had a few kidney infections before.  After recovery I decided to get serious about doing my temps and charting anyway, even though it would be starting on cycle day 38 instead of 1.  Well, my temps were consistently higher than ever before.  I usually run cool, around 97.5.  I kept getting 98.5, 98.6 etc.  A few days later I got 99, so I called the doctor to get an appointment, assuming that I was sick still and that what I had been seeing was actually me with a low grade fever.

At the appointment he said my urine looked good but he'd check my blood count too.  They were running super behind and I didn't get out of there until 6:30 so I didn't expect an answer on that until Monday or Tuesday.  On the way home I decided to buy a dollar store pregnancy test, just in case that was the reason for the original higher temps.  My mom had been watching Teddy and when she saw me with it I told her "I don't think I am."  Surprise of a life time to see two lines!!!!  I even tested again later because I wanted to be sure!!  I'm still shocked.  Doug and I are totally beside ourselves.

So, I feel like I have the biggest secret ever but I'm waiting until we get an appointment with the OB to tell other people.  I'm hoping that he'll want an ultrasound to date it since I ovulated on day 21 instead of 14 it would affect my estimated due date versus just going by last menstrual period.  But right now I'm going off my ovulation date and saying EDD of May 24th, 2013.  I had wanted a late spring/early summer baby and before Teddy was 3 so this fits that part of my dreams perfectly!  Now we're a little freaked out about finding another vehicle and a place to live, but at least Doug finally agrees with me on moving.

Oh, and the doctor called back, I do still have an infection but I don't care because I'm a walking miracle!!!

All grown up!

Teddy is growing up so much!  There are times when I just look at him and I swear he got bigger while I blinked.  I tell him to "slow down" and "don't look so grown up" all the time now.  He is putting together a lot of two and three word sentences now and talking in first person more, exploring emotions such as "I like it!"  The other night I had to put 4t pajamas on him, so I'm going to have to try out a few things for the fall.  I was trying on a few 3t pants that he had and they were too tight around the waist, same with some of the shorts he has, but not all.  It probably varies by brand or something.

Doug has started working at his store in Staunton.  Right now his schedule is 2pm-12am Wed-Friday and then 7am-5 pm Saturday and Sunday, he has Monday and Tuesday off.  He gets off pretty close to his set time, which is a huge difference from Applebee's.  He hasn't been called in for an extra shift or anything yet.  It will happen at some point but so far things are going very smooth there.  He gets more time with us and the only big downside is that getting home late on Friday and going in early on Saturday and then going straight to church makes for a very long day. 

I started watching a little boy two days a week.  He's such a sweetie and for the most part more low maintence than Teddy.  He's 14 months, so it's a really good compatible age for Teddy.  They love each other!  Teddy asks about him when he's not around, R follows Teddy around.  They have opposite nap schedules which is actually great because I don't have to worry about having both of them the whole day, can give Teddy some individual time, R some individual time and no one wakes the other one up.  And Doug is home for part of the day so he spends some time with Teddy then too.  And it means we can take both of them to the playground and Doug can chase after Teddy.  I think it will be awhile before I can do both of them alone there, Teddy just isn't at the age yet where I can take my eyes off of him or trust him to listen.  Totally normal for this age of course.  I'm so glad that Teddy has a little friend to play with!  That's the main reason I'm doing this.  Whenever I ask someone else I know with kids I get brushed off.  I understand they're busy and so am I, but I do know that they meet up with others so what am I supposed to think but that they'd rather not do it with me/Teddy? 

Planning baby #2 is under way.  August was a wash because Doug was gone so much.  But, I think I actually ovulated on my own for the first time ever.  But now I've had two negative tests and no period so I don't know what to think.  Having PCOS, I'm used to not having a period but I was so hopeful that since I had so many signs of ovulation that my body was going to work right on it's own.  Right now I change my mind pretty often about when to call the OB about Clomid treatments again.  We obviously can't be successful on our own if I'm not ovulating and since I didn't shed a lining I don't expect to ovulate this month anyway...or any other month until that happens, hence the need for medication too.  Logistically, waiting until January would probably be best just because Doug just started this job, I want to lose some more weight, all the co-pays involved with the procedures and appointments and we will hopefully have our own house again at the end of next year which would put us with a young infant or newborn versus a potentially mobile child and moving. 

But I also have conflicting feelings about using medication anyway.  I'm really believing that God is going to heal my body some day and I'll conceive on my own.  I know He has his own timing and it's perfect and that if it wasn't in His will we wouldn't be able to conceive even with medication.  But I worry that doing that is a form of doubting His promise.  Then again, when we're sick in other ways we take medicine.  So for now we're keeping it low stress but eventually I'm going to have to commit to one thought or the other. 

And while I'm typing all of this I am supposed to be thinking more about Teddy's second birthday party!  I'm still in denial though so I'm not getting very far!!