Quick catch up

Loving on the toy kitchen at the Crossroads Farmer's Market

Beep beep!  Honk honk!  My backseat driver.

He loves this hat!

Hugging on Big Pooh Bear



Bounce!!




His creative way of carrying them all around.




Chanelling his Theodore Roosevelt



Little man of the house- taking care of the yard.




I wouldn't let him chug my water bottle....think we're nearing 2?!



Teddy is in to all kinds of things now.  He can open doors and work locks and even dead bolts.  Today in the grocery store after a total melt down he was able to open a juice bottle cap. 

He is saying two and even three word sentences now.  Sunday night on the way home from church he said "I got it" like 1,000 times.  His other favorite sentence is "Oh dear"....guess he hears that a lot or something!

He actually really likes to put things away and clean.  He loves the vacuum and loves to sweep and "mop."  Except now he likes to make a mess so he has something to really clean up!  Tonight he threw his container of peas off the table on purpose and then squealed with delight when I gave him the broom to clean it up.  My intention was that I was trying to explain why we shouldn't make a mess on purpose, because someone has to clean it up.  He likes to help me in the kitchen too.  I hand him a bowl and spoon and tell him to "mix."  I found a play kitchen at Once Upon a Child a few weeks ago for a steal and am so excited to give that to him for his birthday because he fell in love with one at a toy shop.  I'd do it early but it didn't come with hardly any pieces so we're working on that.

One of his favorite games right now is to hide.  And it's pretty awesome for me too because he'll just hide behind a curtain or in his "fort" (turned over pnp with a blanket draped over it) and I can sit on my butt for a few minutes.

He still likes balls and cars, trains etc.  He's obsessed with big kids and bikes.  I really want to get him a balance bike for Christmas.

He is so affectionate.  He loves to give hugs and kisses, especially during eating.  I think it's his way of saying "Thanks for the food Mom!"  He also has a bunch of animals that he has to love on all the time.  A pooh bear in his room, a spare in the play room.  A blue bear head lovey, a froggie for church.  Oh, and a sheep.  And a hippo.  And they all have to be in the crib with him.  And I have to hug and kiss each one before nap and bed time.  Oy.

Speaking of sleep now he's sleeping 9pm-8:30 am.  And napping at 2/2:30 for 1-2 hours.  It's working pretty decent, it's nice not to have 6 am wake up calls any more!!  And he's doing better at church too.  Part of that is age but part of that is definitely because he's not staying up so excessively late compared to his normal bed time.

His favorite place is definitely the playground, we're both partial to the Dream Come True one.  Love hearing him clap and say "Yay!!  Playground!!" when we pull up.

He's doing pretty good with Doug gone training right now.  He asks about him sometimes but understands that we said bye bye to Daddy and will see him in a few days.  We do skype with him each day, though technology doesn't always favor us and images will be distorted and just not worth staying on for very long. 

Oh and he loves to read books, especially before bed now.  He will finally!! sit on my lap, or next to me, and read!  He loves learning animals and noises, shapes, letters and numbers but seems resistant to colors.  He knows the whole alphabet and can count to 10, sometimes more.  He is starting to connect sounds and words from his cards and computer with the alphabet.  He'll babble to himself all the time.  I can't understand a lot of it but then every once in a while I hear "I, Igloo....six."  Hahaha, I have no idea how that makes sense in his little world! 

Oh, and mega blocks!  Loves them!  Also loves knocking them down.  But he also loves putting them away.  He's just so amazing and so fun!!

Fancy blogs

So I've had this blog for over 2 years and I still clearly don't have enough patience to fully learn how to use it.  And they keep changing things.  I do want to spend some time on it and make it look all purtiful at some point.

I've read some blogs lately.  Some people are quite pretentious.  Their about me page should just say something about themselves but instead it's like they're trying to impart some kind of great and meaningful wisdom that only their fountain of awesomeness can spew on to me, a most needy public.  It's especially fun when it's someone you know in real life, which actually kind of explains more about them and in the end I'm not surprised by it.  Also interesting is when they make 15 blog posts on these awesome things all in one day.  And their posts are all about getting up and taking part in life.  Um, maybe don't date stamp your posts faker, because you just sat at your computer for how long telling me I'm how inadequate.  Granted, they're supposed to be encouraging, but it seems like they never mis a chance to regale us with tales of all their accomplishments even in spite of their more than you-could-possibly-understand obstacles.  Basically, very wordy put downs.  (Don't worry, no one that has followed this blog or I suspect even reads it).

So, this blog is not fancy or pretty.  It serves no greater and amazing design.  I'm not using it to catalog my profound ponderings and thoughts, to scrap book every awesome memory about Teddy.  The first seem to seldom exist these days and the latter would be too numerous for me to do anything.  I try to update when I get around to it, when there's nothing else more important going on.  I'm sure some of the things I post on here I will forget, like his check up stats, his age at a particular stage (like when he started fighting sleep).  There are others that I will remember forever.  I might not have ever experienced labor with him but I will remind him that I had to give up sugar for 3 months and that one night he nursed for 24 hours straight during his 6 week growth spurt. 

So, I'm sorry viewers.  If you need fancy put downs that are supposed to make you feel motivated, I'm not the spot.  If you need profound thoughts or realized truths, not the spot.  But if you want to know a bit more about me and the real me and Teddy too, you found your spot.  Nothing profound or outstanding, just real people living real life.  And because I can't allow that be the final sentence of this post lest it sound profound I will end it with this one instead. 

An On Time God

I've really been loving my time home with Teddy.  He had some sickness the first week or two I was home.  He had an allergy attack that quickly turned to a sinus infection and 4 days later he came down with an ear infection.  Then as soon as he finished that medication his fever spiked and his ears got way worse, was seen in walk-in hours at his doctor's office and then the ER a few hours later because his fever continued to spike and his ear got red and tender to the touch.  They told me that his middle ear infection must have spread to the ear canal.  Fortunately we went back to the ENT on Monday and they did a culture and gave ear drops.  A few days after ear drops and continued antibiotics and he was so much better!  Turns out that he just had normal "swimmer's ear" bacteria, which is NOT the bacteria which causes middle ear infections.  So it did not spread and resist treatment.  He's never been underwater and has only been in clean water (bath tub and our kiddie pool which is fresh water each time) so it makes the most sense that he scratched his ear canal at some point because he had definitely been digging in it. 

2 weeks later and still healthy and fine!  Well, he has said twice in the last week that his ear hurts but he's also sticking everything way far back in his mouth.  Yesterday he carried around a tooth brush and munched on it all day.  Today he started clear drainage and refused lunch.  He had like 5 gold fish that I gave as a last resort and one bite of cheddar cheese.  I'm going to give him his allergy medicine again tonight just to be safe because he did sneeze a few times but I think it's his 2 year old molars coming in.  I'm going to try to feel and look around in there but he doesn't usually let me.

I've been having a rough few weeks even though Teddy is better.  I broke out in a rash on my face and ears the other week.  After a few days I was pretty sure that I narrowed it down to my sunscreen.  So I went out and purchased a natural one.  The next day I had a little bit of a rash on my face, neck and ears but I woke up with horribly itching hives all over my arms.  It stopped where my shirt sleeves started, I applied the sunscreen on my whole arm though.  No hives or rash on my legs since my skirt had been ankle length.  The doctor thinks I might have a sun allergy.  We can't really test it until the hives go away completely though and then we'll test if it's the sun or the sunscreen.  It made me super exhausted too and is giving me some gastro complaints as well.  But this week has been much better and I've definitely got more energy to get things done.

The biggest update is that Doug will be starting a much better job soon!!  He interviewed the other week for a job and at the time they were talking about giving him a really good position.  Then someone else more qualified was interviewed later and Doug wasn't selected for that position.  They did offer him something lesser but after paying for insurance he'd be taking home the same or less than now.  While insurance can be great, it can also not be worth it.  You pay monthly premiums, high deductibles, co-pays and then a lot of time they deny testing and medications, surgeries etc.  Also, his hours would rotate between first and second shift, he'd have to do overnights pretty often and couldn't be guaranteed to be off for church.  So while it paid more, had more room for advancement and offered insurance (his current job does not), he declined the offer.  We just put it on God's hands and new something better was out there for us.  That He would see us through.  That was last Friday.  On Sunday before church they called and offered the original position they had spoken to him about in the interview but in the next town over.  It was going to be 10am-7pm or so and Mon-Fri, $12/an hour, with benefits.  The regional manager didn't call back the next day to confirm a start date because he wanted to sleep on some things overnight (we found that out later).  Instead he called him on Tuesday and offered an even better job.  Assistant manager of the fast food franchise which is salaried and is going to be at least $500 a more a month than that other offer.  He will work longer hours, have a longer work week and it won't be Mon-Fri but he will be off in time for church most of the time (barring any sudden catastrophe).  There's still a chance of doing overnight every once in a while but since he's a salaried manager he will not be the first to be called in if there's a need.  There are also very impressive quarterly bonuses .  And there is definite room for advancement and then he can make his own hours.  Seriously, doing the math on what we'll be saving we might have down payment money for land and money to build in a year.  Doug met with the manager and saw how the store is run and is confident it won't be like his last restaurant job where everything was so mismanaged and is stressful.  This store is rated one of the best in the state.  At his last job he was hired to try to turn the place around, not a problem at this store!

So excited and so blessed!  God truly is an On Time God!!  This last year has been rough and there have been times when I've been kicking and screaming and digging my heels in during this journey.  But there has also been a lot of growing.  A lot of time being able to get priorities straight, to having a quiet enough life to be able to listen to God, to let him carry us and to give up our pride and independence.  Like the parable of the shepherd that goes after the lamb.  You know shepherds sometimes have to break a lamb's leg so it will not wander off into danger where it can be attacked by wolves and will learn to follow the shepherd.  He will carry that lamb across his shoulders and in his arms and when that leg is mended the lamb has learned to love that shepherd and will never leave his side.  I feel like that's been our experience this last year.  We've made it through serious loss of income, loss of home and items, had to declare bankruptcy, lost everything we once showed our independence and could ensure a happy future.  We had wandered too far off, been in one too many scrapes with the wolves and our Shepherd finally had to make us settle down and spend some time with Him. 

God answers prayer

God always answers prayer....even if it's not the answer you want, or expect.

In my last post I wrote about how I desperately wanted to stay home with Teddy again and that even though I wasn't making hardly any money (turns out I was actually only making $30, not even $60), it wasn't that simple.  Well, things were decided for me.  I'll admit that I've been a bit distracted and conflicted the last few weeks over this.  Also, I am short a co-worker and expected a replacement much earlier.  Basically, I can't do the work of 2 people.  So I've been feeling overwhelmed lately and my work has been suffering a bit because I'm just not enough all by myself.  Monday I made some mistakes and I was pretty upset with myself afterwards and went home and resolved that I'd just have to put my personal feelings entirely aside at work, hammered out a better schedule and googled things about helping with stress and a better workflow.  Tuesday at the end of the day I was sat down.  I knew my performance wasn't the best the last few weeks, I was actually happy someone was going to talk to me about it, perhaps they had ideas on how I could improve.  Instead it seems that for all ten months I've worked there I've made too many mistakes.  No one ever even hinted of that before.  Of course I make mistakes.  Every other job I've had allows for a certain amount of human error.  I'm still not sure if mine were just too high or if they just want perfection.  Like I don't know if 5% of error is acceptable but I was doing 25% or what- I'm not sure if they know or have thought about quantifying it that way either.

Anyway, I was very upset.  But Doug and I got to talk about it and I put in my notice.  If I'm not actually doing a good job then I'm not helping them.  Then the idea of needing to be around because they're short an employee and another is set to begin a temporary leave is silly.  And what's $30 a month?  Dinner out.  It's not like we save $30 a month, mentally it's just difficult to think about it that way.  I'm going to save $40 a month just on not buying disposable diapers for day care now.  I'll save money in groceries and gas.  We're actually going to be coming out ahead.  I know that sounds counter-intuitive but it's not.

I'm a little disapointed that I apparently am a failure at this job.  It's not easy for me to admit that.  I still don't see how, but what do I know.  But mostly, I see this as God answering my prayer, though not at all as I imagined it.  And as a test to see if I can still love myself.  I don't have to take some sort of "Nuh-uh!!" attitude, I can love myself even with my flaws.  I might have reasons or excuses or contributing factors that I could spend all day explaining to me not being great or perfect or apparently even adequate at this job, but none of it matters.  What matters is that this job does not define me, I do not measure my self-worth and life success by my ability to perform at this time in my life at that job.  Of course I want to do things well, but it's alright if it turns out I don't have the right stuff.  I gave it my best and that's not good enough.  I know a place where I'm always good enough....in the arms of my son!!

We'll see how we do on our super tight budget and reevaluate in a few months.  Hopefully it will continue to make sense for me to stay home with him.  And since one of the biggest reasons why we didn't want to have a second yet was because of daycare, then we're one step closer.  There are still other things, like paying for the medical care of the pregnancy and birth.  Hopefully I'd be able to breastfeed again, but after the baby starts solids there's the increase in food and little things will go up as well.  I'd do laundry more frequently etc.  I told you we were on a tight budget!  I think I'm going to start a separate blog about that to inspire myself and keep me on track!

When are you having another one?

I'm getting this comment a lot lately.  Around here it seems like everyone (and maybe it's the national average, I really don't know) have their kids closer together.  Teddy is 1 1/2, so clearly I must be thinking about number 2, right?! 

Honestly, it makes me really sad.  On some level it's crazy to think about because I'm just so wrapped up in him and it's hard to picture having another one, less attention on Teddy, #2 will have less attention than Teddy got.  But I definitely do want siblings for him and I know those are normal feelings that work themselves out.

What makes me sad is that it was a long road of getting pregnant with Teddy.  Then I had a hard pregnancy.  And of course, there's money.  I don't hate my job, it's the best one I've ever had and I'm learning lots of great skills.  I've decided to put my MA in history on hold.  If I want to finish it I can later, but it's not a very feasible job market.  I've realized that I want to study history forever, but I don't need it to be my career.  I'm prefectly happy job wise in the healthcare administration field.  I tried other majors besides history in college but always came back to it.  I only recently realized my issue was that when I'd open the books for the other majors they didn't excite me and I found myself thinking "I can't do this forever!"  Well, you don't study a book forever!  Putting what you learn to practice is so different than actually doing the reading, writing and test taking on it! 

But I hate the idea of having to work full time, of missing out on time with a new baby.  It makes me want to bawl when I think of that baby not getting time with me the way Teddy did.  I already feel bad about my time away from Teddy.  I'm working more hours temporarily right now, but if it's not an option permantely then I'll have to find a second part time job because with the regular hours after day care and the extra in gas, insurance and food, I only make $60 a month.  At the same time, I've tried and there's just no where to cut that $60.  Even if I did, that would just break us even.  What I would need to do is find a way to cut even more so we could actually save.  But right now with the extra hours things are working out quite nicely.

Until I'd have to pay for child care for a second child, diapers, food etc.  Then our budget is bust given both options.  So basically I would need to suck it up and find full time employment with a bit higher pay or wait until Teddy is in pre-K.  It's so hard to accept this because all I've ever really wanted to do was be a mother.  I wanted to homeschool my kids and now it looks like the only way I'll be able to have additional children is when each one starts school.  The idea of this being reality for me breaks my heart.  I know things might change.  Doug could get a really great job tomorrow, he wants to finish school and might get a better one then, in about 2 years.  After that I might get a Master's in Healthcare Adminsitration, and that would pay more, even if it wasn't full time.  Or I might be able to work from home. 

What really breaks my heart is that when Doug worked at Applebee's we could have found a way to live on one salary.  What really got us was that the condo was too expensive for us and no one wanted to rent it or buy it (or any of the others available and for sale).  We could have afforded something less expensive but still not have to live with my father-in-law.  I stand behind my husband 1000% for his reasons for quitting.  I stand behind him 1000% for not taking the other restaurant jobs he found.  And I stand behind him 1000% for putting availability for church ahead of work.  But I can't help but feel like things should have worked out by now.  It's been a year.  A very, very, very long and hard year.  I guess, I know how much things can change in a year now. 

Who knows, maybe things will be so much better this time next year.  But right now, I wonder how this is working in God's plan.  How can it be God's plan for me to have to work and barely contribute and have to pick between spending time with my child and earning more money so we can have some saved for a rainy day, our own place or college?  I know I was made to be a mother, it's the only thing I've tried that gives me real and true joy.  There are women out there that go back to work because they feel more fulfilled.  No judgement on them at all, but that's not me.  I think people actually expect that of me because I have a college degree, because I am studious and serious.  But I don't feel more fulfilled at all.  College was just the back up plan, in case we really needed 2 incomes at some point.  I thought it would give me more opportunities than without it.  I've seen lots of women who were only able to work at grocery stores or clean houses etc.  Those are great jobs (which I've done, by the way) but I know they leave you tired and drained and don't pay a lot.  I thought I could always work when the kids were older or grown.  And not to start a mommy war, but it really kills me that his day care teacher spends more time with him during a day then I do.  He's learning so much right now and it's not from me! 

Well, anyway, nosey folks everywhere, that's why we're not having a second one yet.  And I'm not for sure when we will.  From a financial stand point a lot of things would have to change and it will be several more years.  From a biological stand point, who knows if my stupid body will agree to a second pregnancy which opens a whole different can of worms.  So my concise answer to this question is:  "We're gladly accepting donations to the 'Give Teddy a Sibling Fund'!"

Monthly survey:


1.  How old is baby? He's 18 months and 2 weeks.

2. Stats:

a. Weight: He wouldn't let the nurse weigh him.  Before they called us all he wanted to do was play with he scale (we were in the back waiting room).  Anyway, he was 30 pounds last week, so we'll go with that.

b. Height: 33 inches.

c. Clothes size: Definitely 2t/24 month.  Hoping that will last all summer.
d. Diaper size: Size large for cloth, though in my GMD prefolds I'm going to buy extra large soon. Size 6for sposies, which we use for daycare.

e. Hair color: it's turning more strawberry blonde.

f. Eye color:  Finally decided on hazel gray/green. 

g. Anything else?

3. Milestones:
a. Teething: Still 18.  His gums still seem swollen and he occasionally stuffs things way back there but it doesn't look like the 2 year old molars will be appearing any time soon.

b. Talking:  I tried counting them all yesterday, it's 55-60.  It can be hard to count because he'll parrot our words a lot too.  So if we say to him "Can you say yogurt" and he says "yogurt" that doesn't technicallly count but if he calls it "yogurt" then it does.  But it's not like he says 60 words all day long, some of them don't come up very often, or get replaced by newer words that he loves to use and show off.  Right now that word is "no-no!!"  Also a big change since last month:  he says help versus fussing or signing please 90% of the time!
He understands lots of other words thoughs. And it's not like he will come up and ask for an egg or anything. But he will say it if he sees it in his alphabet book. Best thing is fish to him means fishie kisses! So I get those when we read that book!


c. Rolling: He likes to roll around in our bed now.

d. Walking: Walking and running pro now! He's getting really fast!

e. Crawling: He doesn't do it very often anymore.

f. Anything else? He will sing songs on his own, and try to sing with us to ones he knows like "Je La" is Jesus Loves Me.

4. Things he likes:

a. Toys: Grandad recently got him a sandbox, he has a pool, toy lawn mower.  He still plays with other toys but honestly, I need to go through them and find some things that are more challenging for him.  In the mean time his favorite thing is the broom and vacuum.
b. Books: He loves his alphabet book, his Mickey mouse light and sound book, his trucks book

c. TV Shows: He likes Mickey Mouse.
d. Music:  Still loves to sing and dance!  Singing can cure about 95% of the crankiness.  And now he can reach the pump organ with one hand and actually press the pedal with his foot and make sound come out all on his own.  We really need to get a piano/keyboard for him!
5. Things he dislikes: Most foods.  He's suddenly got very picky.  Tonight was the first night in 2 weeks that dinner wasn't a battle.  Mom didn't give him snack so he was pretty hungry I guess.  Interesting thing is that it was left overs from Wednesday, which he threw all over the ground.  So, I guess time made it tastier?  The problem really is that he suddenly has preferences but not a way to express them.  If only he could say "Mother, tonight I'm in the mood for chicken, not ham.  And the lima beans please!"
6. Sleeping:  His bed time is now 8 pm.  The problem is that most day care days he needs to get up at 6:30.  Well, 7 now that he's not nursing.  There have been a few nights when he didn't go to sleep right away and stayed up chatting in the crib and was really tired in the morning.  He's in the "almost 2's" room at day care now and they nap on a mat on the floor and apparently he's doing really well with that!
7. Eating: See above.  I was right about self-weaning.  This Monday he refused to nurse and didn't want much breakfast.  I decided to try the "don't offer, don't refuse" route on Tuesday and haven't looked back.  He hasn't asked for it at all.  For weeks before hand he'd barely nurse in the morning, his only feeding.  Honestly, I could have probably weaned him without a problem a few months ago, but I wasn't ready.  I'm glad it was so easy!!  I hope it is for the next one(s)!!
8. Nicknames: I don't think this section changes ever, let alone monthly, not sure why it's in here!

9. Things we’re looking forward to next month: Warmer weather so enjoying the pool!  Both at home and across town.  Walks in the morning or evening.  Playing in the sand box!  Playing outside in general.  Maybe a visit with Aunt Cindy in VA Beach.
10. How I like motherhood:

a. Likes: Love it!  I love his personality.  It's great seeing some of the best of me in him.

b. Dislikes: I wish I had more time with him.  Even when I'm not working there's so much to do and I wish I could just sit and play with him more.  But then when I try he's in more of an independent play stage so I just end up watching him.  It makes me miss my little baby and wonder where the time went!  I worry about the future a lot more now.  I feel like I always have to think ahead.  Things that are so second nature to me clearly aren't to others seeing as how they don't see how it could potentially go wrong.  Not only is it exhausting to constantly be thinking like that but also it's frustrating to feel let down by others and/or that they can't do things "right."  Doug for example is great with Teddy at home, but he's seldom gone on an errand with him alone (as in only once and that was last month).  He just doesn't think ahead to being gone during snack time, needing diapers and entertainment.  Trying to do errands without getting in and out of the car a thousand times (pay for gas at the pump, drive through at the bank etc.)  The other day I was sick and also had a follow up appointment for Teddy and asked my mom to help.  She brought a magazine in and kept checking her cell phone.  Yeah....that's not really helping with a toddler in a room full of no-no's!!  So basically, I'm reaching a stage where it's becoming a strain on my other relationships more than a strain on me....guesss that's confidence?

Things are looking up

It's no secret the last several months have been ridiculously hard on us.  Like just too many things adding up at once.  There have been very few days when the three of us have all been happy and healthy at once since Christmas.  But especially Teddy with the ear infections.  He would just be so fussy and annoyed all day long.

He had tube surgery on May 3rd and literally by later that evening was like a new kid!  He was happy and playing by himself.  The surgery itself was super fast and easy.  Teddy was a little crazy with the effects of anesthesia.  I let him nurse and that helped a lot.  I think he just needed something comforting while it worked off.  By the time we got home it's like he never even had surgery. 

The next day I went ahead to work since he was feeling so great and my mom watched him.  He felt a little warm before I left but didn't have a fever and had been running around so I thought nothing of it.  When I got home my mom said that he had a low fever that afternoon.  It seemed like he wasn't feeling near as well 36 hours after the surgery than he was even 12 hours after.  I asked my boss about it (I work for the ENT who did the surgery) and they said that it was unlikely a fever that far out from the surgery was related.  It of course is possible for him to get another ear infection but he would have had other signs, which he didn't.  He slept fine that night.

Saturday during the day he seemed good until 5 pm.  He had just had his bath, we were eating dinner and getting ready for church when Doug noticed a rash on his hands, feet and around his mouth.  He had been exposed to Hand, Foot, Mouth Disease at daycare, so we knew this was a possibility.  We didn't go to church and I called his family doctor on call that evening.  I just wanted to be sure that it wasn't anything that he could benefit from having a definite diagnosis earlier than Monday because the office doesn't have Sunday hours.  He said given what I said it's probably HFM but even if it's chicken pox, while there would be things we could do to help moreso with that, it would be fine to wait until Monday. 

Sunday the rash had spread up his legs and then eventually on his trunk and some on his back.  My SIL came over to visit and said she thought it was chicken pox, as did my mother.  When Teddy was born I chose to do a delayed vaccination schedule.  I just wasn't comfortable with him getting 6 shots at once and in case he had a reaction it would be difficult to access which it was to.  Since I was a stay at home mom I had no qualms.  When we put him in day care I decided to catch him up because I have to show all of his immunizations anyway and I'm not his only care giver.  Well, he's still behind on some things, such has he hasn't had his chicken pox vaccination yet.  I honestly wouldn't freak out if he got it.  I'm on the fence about it.  My grandmother had shingles (a virus that is common in older people who have been previously infected with the chicken pox) and it was terrible for her.  He may be 60 before he gets it and who knows if I'll be alive but I'd still like to avoid my "baby" being in that sort of pain.  At the same time....people get it and they don't die from it.  Though I suppose that could be said for most vaccines these days.  Very few people would die of the infections because of our medical standards in a Western nation.  But if I can prevent it and much smarter people than me have suggested it's worth doing than I'll defer to them.

Anyway.....we got him checked on Monday.  I was at work and my mom brought him.  I was supposed to leave in just enough time for the appointment but my mom got there a few minutes early and they took him back right away (probably because it was possible he had chicken pox) and by the time I even left the office he was done.  The doctor said it was just a normal viral rash and he could go back to daycare the next day.

The rest of the week was uneventful.  Until the weekend.  I had been on antibiotics for a sinus infection and still breastfeed once a day.  Teddy ended up with a yeast infection and was craaaaanky!

Sunday I ended up with some kind of upset stomach.

Wednesday, May 16th we were in the ER because Teddy dislocated his elbow!!  It's called Nursemaid's Elbow and is apparently quite common.  It must have happened at daycare though the teacher isn't exactly sure how/when.  It commonly happens when a child is holding an adult's hand and then suddenly sits down or stumbles and the adult yanks to balance the child.  When I picked him up that afternoon they had said he was really listless after his nap but no fever or any reason why.  Same for us that evening.  He fussed anytime he moved basically and wouldn't eat but did play a little and we saw him move that arm.  He went to sleep no problem at his usual time but woke up at 2:30.  He was actually just fussing, not even steady fussing and not crying.  But it's my policy to check on him when I know he's not feeling well.  It made me very uneasy that I knew he didn't feel well but I couldn't figure out what was wrong.  When I got to him he was laying instead of standing.  His left arm was sprawled out and his fingers just a bit between the mattress and the crib.  He was fussing like his fingers were stuck, but they weren't.  He was moving the right side of his body, but not the left.  He wailed when I picked him up and his left arm was entirely limp.  It really freaked me out.  Doug and I both kept trying to get him to move his arm but he wouldn't.  Every time we did he cried.  He asked to play with a ball and had problems balancing and I was worried there was something neurological going on so we brought out a book but he was able to name things in it so that made us feel better.  Finally we saw him move his left arm just a bit so we knew he at least had control over it but simply didn't want to move it because it hurt.  All this and getting dressed took about 45 minutes and we headed to the ER.  There was very little wait and we were in and out in 2.5 hours!  There was a psycho guy next to us though.  After getting the elbow back in place he still didn't want to move it so we followed up with an x-ray just to be safe.  Everything looked fine and we went home.  It took until much later Thursday afternoon for him to really use the arm at all, and even now he still protects it some.  Poor baby!!!  We got home after 6 am, by the way.

Friday was his follow up appointment with his primary care doctor to check his elbow, everything looked great.  It was the second time in 2 hours we were at the office because I woke up that morning with pink eye!!  Feeling much better now but it made for a long day to go to the doctor's office twice in one morning and then I had to spend the rest of the morning running quick errands (like cashing a check after running around trying to locate it) and then the pharmacy. 

I'll be honest.  I thought after getting Teddy's tubes, that it would be a quick fix it and everything would be better.  I thought if we could just hold out until then!  And then the rash came, and my stomach and the elbow.  Earlier in the week I had been talking to a friend and she said that it seemed like we had been through so much!  While I totally agree, I've finally made "this too shall pass" be my mantra.  So it's been awhile since we've been healthy and able to make it to church....but this too shall pass.  I've been a believer for 16 years, I'm firm in my faith, this time span is barely a drop in the bucket compared to that.

So we finally got to church tonight and it was amazing!  The sermon was great, and I know so because I actually got to hear the whole entire thing!!!!!!!!!!!!  We finally found someone we were able to swap seats with so I could get up as often as needed with Teddy but I only had to take him out twice.  Once during song service when he pooped, so I changed his diaper and gave him a snack and once after the sermon because he wanted to be loud during the prayer line.  That's right, he played nicely for the whole sermon.  I don't expect it to be this way for most days, or even ever again, really but it was so nice!!  He can entertain himself at home between various activities and seldom needs/wants me involved but obviously he has a lot more space and can make more noise.  But this was really nice.  We won't make it tomorrow because we've got a friend's wedding as well as next Saturday but I'm hopeful about next Sunday then.  He stayed up 2 hours past his bed time (we've successfully pushed it to 7:30-8 now) and wasn't insane.  I'm really just beyond thrilled with this!  Also, apparently he is really good at coloring now.  Last time I tried with him he could barely put enough pressure on the page to make a color appear and it just annoyed him, so it's been weeks.  I'm not sure if it was daycare or my mom...but he got practice in somewhere!  He will hold a crayon in both hands.  He won't color at the same time, but it will be funny when he figures it out.

Next post will be after his 18 month appointment.  I'm not sure why when I scheduled it after his 15 month one they had to make it 2 months after he turns 18 months but whatever.  I do know that Friday his weight at the office was 30 pounds, but Thursday at the ER they said 28.1.  I wonder which scale is more correct?  We'll see how tall he is!  He's definitely in 2T stuff now.  One day he woke up and his 18 month pants were way too short and it was too cold for shorts so I had to go and buy several pairs of 2t pants for him.  I'm worried about the fall/winter!  I hope he won't be in 3T by then.  Supposedly growth is supposed to slow down but I'll bet you $1,000 he'll be in 3T long before his third birthday.  Ideally I'd like it to be next spring.  Then these pants I just bought (for the random week of 60 degree weather which has now returned to 80) can last through the fall/winter too.